George O’Mally drives a big ol’ 1974 Caddy just like this one. His is bright red, too, but the craftsmanship used in taping the tears on his seats is not nearly the same quality as is executed on this one.
George retired from the Fort Stockton Regional Airport and Feedlot several years back. Having lived the excitement of being the one responsible for waving the incoming aircraft away from where the herd was grazing, retirement was an adjustment.
After six or eight months of not having someplace to go every morning, George started getting in the big red Coupe de Ville and heading down to the Grounds for Divorce for coffee. Coffee soon turned into lunch. Eventually lunch stretched all the way to dinner. Before long, he became a fixture at the cafe.
One day, when Lucinda was out due to having a boil lanced in Mason, George actually strapped on an apron and started taking orders and refilling cups of coffee to help out. In no time he was on the payroll and amongst the gainfully employed once again.
Brother Bob from the Second Baptist Church was in for coffee and pie after services one Sunday morning when he accidentally dropped his spoon on the floor. George was there in no time and handed him a spoon out of his pocket. While Brother Bob stirred his coffee, George explained he kept a spoon in his pocket just for such instances, so he wouldn’t have to walk all the way back to the kitchen to retrieve a new one when needed.
As Brother Bob sipped his coffee, he couldn’t help but notice a small string hanging out of the fly of George’s khaki pants. Curiosity got the best of him and he asked George what that was for.
“That’s for when I have to use the bathroom. I can pull the string and not touch anything. Saves time not having to wash my hands. I can get right back to serving customers.”
Brother Bob thought about that for a minute. “How do you get it back in your pants?”
“The spoon.”
George was a classic. Perhaps a bit past his prime. Maybe a little rough around the edges. But still a lot of fun to have around. Much like a No Reserve ’74 Cadillac Coupe de Ville.
4 responses to “SPOONING IN A CADDY”
Sigmund, a Houston psychiatrist was passing through Ft Stockton on his way to a sex therapy conference in Los Angeles. He found himself at the Grounds For Divorce for breakfast, and was invited to sit with the regulars. Asked about his conference, Sigmund grabbed a napkin, drew an abstract, and asked what they saw. Rusty Hammer from the hardware store responded “Sex”.
With the 2nd abstract, pharmacist Rex Hall noted “Sex”, and with the 3rd abstract drawing Brother Bob from Second Baptist Church agreed “Sex!”.
Sigmund the psychiatrist announced that this group seemed to have an obsession with sex.
Lucinda responded
“But you’re the one drawing the dirty pictures!”
A preacher buys a parrot
“Are you sure it doesn’t scream, yell, or swear?” asked the preacher.
“Oh absolutely. It’s a religious parrot,” the storekeeper assures him.
“Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord’s prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm.”
“Wonderful!” says the preacher, “but what happens if you pull both strings?”
“I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!” screeched the parrot.
Made my morning!
Now that was funny!