STORIES

MISS ELIZABETH BUYS A FORD, Part II


Part 2 of 2:

Tracy offered his customer a cup of coffee, which she initially declined, but then reconsidered and took him up on.  “Just one sugar, no cream.”  She was specific in her coffee, just like everything else in her life.

“Exact same way I drink mine,” Tracy said.  “Be right back.”  He returned a few moments later with two cups of steaming hot coffee and carefully set Miss Elizabeth’s down in front of her, then his own on the other side of the desk.

“I see in the brochure that there is a Fairlane available, rather than the Fairlane 500.   I’m curious as to what the difference is.”  She was business-like, but insistent.  “I’d like to see one.”

“Well, Miss Elizabeth,” Tracy said patiently, “I’m happy to show you one, but we’ll have to step outside to see them.  There isn’t one on the showroom floor.  Perhaps it would be a better idea to step back over to the Fairlane 500 on the showroom floor and I will point out all the things you get with the Fairlane 500 that do not come on the basic Fairlane.  Feel free to bring your coffee.”

The two of them went back over to the light green sedan on the showroom floor and stood near the rear of the car.

“Do you see those bright moldings around each of the windows?” Tracy asked.  Miss Elizabeth nodded back.  “Those do not come on the basic Fairlane.  Nor does the chrome script on the front fenders that tells the world you’re Driving a Fairlane 500.  The five chrome chevrons on the rear fenders?  Not included in the basic Ford.  See how it spells out F-A-I-R-L-A-N-E across the trunk.  It just says F-O-R-D on the standard Fairlane.  In fact, it doesn’t even say ‘Fairlane’ anywhere on the low priced Fairlane.  Just FORD.”

“I understand,” Miss Elizabeth noted. ” However, those things don’t really do anything.  They’re just ornamentation.”



“Yes, they are,” Tracy replied.  “I see you’re wearing a lovely necklace this morning.”  Miss Elizabeth clutched her pearls.  “So you do, in fact, have an eye for ornamentation and appreciate how it sets off something that is already beautiful.”  Tracy wondered if perhaps he might have gone just a bit too far with the comparison.  Miss Elizabeth just smiled.

“There are more differences inside.  Let’s take a look.”  Tracy once again held the door open for Miss Elizabeth to slide into the cabin behind the wheel.  “Note the upholstery.  Modern durable, high-fashion.  Do you see how Mylar is woven into the fabric?”  Miss Elizabeth let her hand run over the fabric, like she was trying on a dress.  “Do you see how the metallic accents on the doors set off the upgraded interior?”  She nodded in the affirmative.  “The flooring?  Note how it is color keyed to match the upholstery.  In the basic model, it’s just black.  In addition, there is a courtesy lamp that comes on when you open the doors, armrests on the rear doors for whatever guests you may have back there, as well as an ashtray.”

While falling under the spell of all the bells and whistles, Miss Elizabeth was also attempting to remain as objective as she could.  “I don’t smoke.  Why would I need an ash tray back there?”

“But do any of your many friends or relatives who might be joining you?”  Tracy asked.

She thought about Pearl, from the Women’s Club at church.  “Well, we do go to lunch every so often.  And Pearl has the habit . . . .  What does all this cost?”

“It’s all standard on the Fairlane 500.” Tracy responded.  “And the Fairlane 500 is only $77 more than the basic Ford.  Pennies, really, when you think about how long you’ll keep this fine car.”  He knew the hook had been set.  He just needed to reel it in order to move on.

Miss Elizabeth looked over her shoulder at the spacious rear seat.  She noted the arm rests and the ashtray.  She thought about how comfortable her friends would be back there when they went to lunch.  “Seventy-seven dollars, huh?”

“Ma’am, I want to be completely honest with you.”  Tracy felt like she was ready.  “The basic Fairlane is a workhorse, and a fine car.  It’s what you would ride in if you ever took a cab to the train station.  Heaven forbid, you ever had to sit in a police car.”  She looked up at him with a scowl.  “Provided you had witnessed an accident or some such.  Never for anything more severe,” he noted.  

“But this is not a police car or a taxi cab you are purchasing.  It is your own personal mode of transportation that will tell the world who you are, before you even get out of the car.”  He could tell the reasoning was sound and helped her over the edge.  “Just like when you purchase a new dress.  Do you ever go with the cheapest?  Or do you select the greatest value that will look the very best on you?”

“Let’s write up the contract,” Miss Elizabeth said.

Tracy retrieved the paperwork from his desk, refilled both their coffee cups, and went over all the details of the new 1960 Ford Fairlane 500 Town Sedan that Miss Elizabeth was ordering.  She selected Corinthian White, a single color for top and body.  “There’s no point in being flashy,” she noted.  She went with the standard 223 cubic inch Mileage Maker Six.  “All the power I’ll ever need.  Anything else would just waste gas.”  

Tracy convinced her to spend the extra $10.70 for back-up lights.  “They’ll really be helpful when backing out of the garage, or really, backing up anywhere at night.”  

She took his advice.  She agreed to go with the Ford-O-Matic automatic transmission, as well.  “It really will make trips around town less cumbersome.”  She drew the line at a radio, however.  “That would just be a distraction I don’t want to have to deal with,” she told him.  In fact, the only option she selected, other than the backup lights and Fordomatic, was white wall tires.  “We’re not animals, for goodness sake,” Miss Elizabeth told him when he asked her if she wanted the standard black walls.

“Massachusetts winters, or what we do to the streets during them have a devastating effect on a car. I highly recommend the undercoating for the life of the investment you’re making in this fine automobile,” Tracy said. “I would insist on it if you were my own aunt.” He seemed sincere, and his argument was valid. She nodded. He added it to the contract and made a note to have the car sprayed when it came in, prior to delivery to Miss Elizabeth.



When the car came in six weeks later, on June 8th, 1960, Tracy called Miss Elizabeth at Bradley’s Department Store to let her know she could come in and pick it up.  He thought she had a little tear in her eye the very first time she saw it.  It was the first time she’d shown any vulnerability and he thought it made her look sweeter than she did when she’d been in to place the order. “It’s beautiful.  Just like we ordered it.  The blue interior and white exterior were the perfect choices.”  It was after she’d gotten off work, and the sun was setting later than it had in a long time.  The sunset hit the Fairlane 500 just right and every angle and curve seemed to catch the light just right.  She wrote out the check and slid it across the desk after reviewing the simple invoice for the car.  

Along with the check was a name and a phone number written on a small floral card.  Tracy glanced at it and thought how awkward it was that she would be giving him her number.  There was a fifteen year difference in their ages, at least, maybe more.  Then he noticed that the last name was hers, but the first name said ‘Marilyn’.  “This is the name and number of my niece.  I’m sure she’s about your age and a fine young woman.  It seems to me like you two might hit it off.  You should give her a call.”  Tracy glanced at the card again and slipped it into his pocket.  “I’m surprised Doug hasn’t tried to set you two up already,” she said.

“I am too,” Tracy noted.  Then he walked her out to her brand new Ford Fairlane 500 and made sure she knew how to operate the simple controls, switches and buttons on the car.  He made sure she understood what the round key was for, and what the squarish one did, as well as how to use the choke when starting the car.  And with that, she set off towards her two bedroom, one bath, bungalow, hoping the new car would fit inside the one car garage.

Tracy called Marilyn later that week.  They married the following June, a year almost to the day from when Miss Elizabeth brought the new Ford home.  Doug served as best man.  Four of the nineteen nieces and nephews Miss Elizabeth could later claim were a direct result of her buying a new Fairlane 500.  The grand nieces and grand nephews eventually became too many to keep up with.



Miss Elizabeth never bought another car.  “No need to,” she told Tracy every time he tried to get her to come see the new models at the dealership.  “The Fairlane 500 is all I could ever want or need.” He knew better than to argue, even as the Ford got older, more out of date and obsolete with each passing model year. She always brought it in to be serviced at the dealership, for all of the 40,000 miles she drove it.

Elizabeth Dvochak passed away quietly surrounded by her family at a nursing facility in Springfield Massachusetts on December 30th, 2003.  It’s not known what happened to the Fairlane 500 until it popped up for sale in 2015 on the internet and wound up being shipped to Arizona.  In 2024, the very same Fairlane 500 made its way to Texas, the next stop in a pretty interesting journey.



21 responses to “MISS ELIZABETH BUYS A FORD, Part II”

  1. I wasn’t aware the Fairlane in your garage ended up in Arizona prior to your purchase. I would have gone to it’s location and looked at it for you. Seems it wasn’t needed, but would have been a pleasure to do it for you.

    • Fortunately, another reader of the blog was close by. He’s the one who found it and notified me of its availability, then was kind enough to go check it out and push me over the edge with the decision to purchase it.

      But thanks for the offer; I’ll keep it in mind.

  2. Interesting. I live like 25 miles from where this car was originally sold.

    Loved the tale, regardless of whether it is tall or short. Keep it up.

  3. History can be informative, and even sweet – even if somewhat concocted.
    Thanks for the morning starter over myCMC cuppa’ Folgers.

  4. What agreat story. Perhaps we learn more about how you learned about Miss Elizabeth in a future installment of “From the “Back of the Bermuda”.

  5. “Every car is a story. Not all of them are true.”

    But not every story comes complete with 64-year old documentation right there in the glove compartment, correct, Captain? Betcha you had fun concocting that backstory for the Fairlane 500 now sitting out in your garage! Also, I’ll bet Miss Elizabeth would be twirling in her coffin if she knew some crazy Texan just put fender skirts on her otherwise sensibly accessorized baby. How couldja do that, Cap’n?

  6. A schmooze-meister sold it originally and a schmooze-meister enjoys it now. Good on ‘ya, Captain.

  7. Captain, I’m a fairly new reader, probably started reading your stories at the beginning of 2024 …and I must say I’ve thoroughly enjoyed every one of them (What Drives Eileen hooked me!). I don’t believe you write fiction, it is my belief every one of the characters and situations in your stories are as real as the paper you write it on. I’ve been thinking this for quite a while now, and the Miss Elizabeth story convinced me. I love the magic. Thank you!

    • After reading your very plausible comment about the Captain’s cast of characters being real and then thinking about Mayor Goodman, I nearly choked on my breakfast taco.

    • Yep. The Captain can take a kernel of truth mixed with general knowledge & private investigation, sprinkle basic facts with major embellishments, and bake it all in the Fort Stockton sun for a bit, et voilà, a king cake of literary nourishment fit for an Admiral or an ensign.
      Yes, Sir, he ranks right up there. Magic? Could be, but to my knowledge neither Harry Potter nor Samantha Stevens used a spell checker. d;)
      Quincy hit the nail right on the head re “schmooze-meister”.
      Cappy, don’t listen to Hairless about the skirts; they look great. And, Miss Elizabeth may have sprung for them had she been told fender skirts decrease wind resistance yielding better gas mileage plus reduce road grime buildup that dulls the paint.

    • Thanks for saying so. I’ll be the first to admit the best stories have just the right mix of plausibility and pure conjecture. That ratio changes as needed.

  8. CMC: Kudos for describing a true professional automobile sales person who actually knew how to be considerate to a customer. There was none of this I have to talk to my manager and getting their lips ripped off in the box.

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